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The Saint
3 out of 103 out of 103 out of 103 out of 103 out of 10
Rated: PG-13
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Val Kilmer. Elisabeth Shue. The Saint. It sounded good. I was pumped to see this movie! But sadly this movie's trailer (or preview) was better than the movie. Val Kilmer would have been wiser to remain as Batman than to attempt the impossible mission of turning The Saint into Mission Impossible.
I was hoping for it not to be corny and stupid, but from the very beginning I realized that I was being let down. The movie begins with Kilmer's character as a child being punished for not saying his name as bestowed upon him by the Priest running the orphanage. The Priest is overly abusive and the child is overly composed. The child eventually makes a lock-picking device that works a little too easily. He then tries to rescue his girlfriend. But, get this, the abusive Priest brings in attack dogs to stifle the childish rebellion that has taken place. The dogs wind up tossing the girl off of a balcony to her death. The child who would then grow up to be "The Saint" escapes.
So by the time Val Kilmer even appeared I had my doubts. I was then somewhat amused to see Kilmer take on many different disguises. But my enjoyment did not last long. What really ruined this movie were the villians. They were not hard to spot. Let's see. Four men, with long black hair, dressed in black, driving a black car, and the leader of whom carries a black cane. They did not, despite their black props, scare me in the least. Rather, they were just plain dorks.
I usually, as a rule, try to suspend some disbelief so that I may allow myself to be captured by the movie. But this movie makes this almost impossible. For instance, the whole thing with "cold fusion" (a new type of energy source that requires no natural resources) and how the formulas were simply placed on a couple of notecards was completely unbelievable and silly. And the two nerd agents (one male, the other female) who are supposed to be tracking down "the Saint" are, like much of the movie, overdone and unrealistic.
And as if the makers of this movie could somehow sense that this movie might not do so well, they had to sell themselves with a little commercialism. Every single computer shown this movie is made by Apple.
It is not that I do not like Val Kilmer and/or Elisabeth Shue. Quite on the contrary I regard both of them in high esteem. I think that Val Kilmer turned in one of the best performances I have ever seen when he played Doc Holliday in Tombstone. And Elisabeth Shue is as desirable and as intelligent as one could hope for in this role. However, the point is that these two just plain turned in blase performances in The Saint. There was no chemistry there at all.
But I do have some important praise to give to this movie. This movie was able to do what not many movies of today are: give us an action-packed movie with relatively no killings. This movie is rated PG-13 which could easily been switched to R if it had blindly followed the path of most of today's movies and added in a few dozen murder scenes. To this end, The Saint delighted me with its boldness to be a somewhat decent movie. Now if it had only been one worth seeing...
thumbs down!Don't waste your money or your time on this one. It is spring now! Ride a bike. Play basketball. There are hundreds of things better to do than see this movie.

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