This year, in 2003, Disney set out to turn two of their most popular rides in their Theme Parks into blockbuster movies; those rides being, of course, The Haunted Mansion and The Pirates of the Caribbean. This is the opposite of what was done with most all other rides at Disney World or Disneyland, because the movie usually comes first and a ride is made to go along with it (as are toys, games, clothing, lunch boxes, breakfast cereals, etc.). Thus, Disney probably felt that they weren't cashing in quite enough on these two rides.
In any case, whatever their motive, their first attempt was an enormous success. Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl is hands down one of the best films of the year. But could lightening strike twice for Disney? The answer is...not quite.
The Haunted Mansion is entertaining, to a point. It is scary at times (as it should be with such a title) and has some funny parts as well (as you would expect with Eddie Murphy). But for the most part, it lacks any sort of drive. Instead, the story seems rather disorienting, which is appropriate for a haunted mansion, but not for a movie script. The setup seems quite fun: a real-estate agent (actually a husband-wife team played by Eddie Murphy and Marsha Thomason) is hired to sell a mansion...little do they know that it is haunted. However, once the Evers family arrives at the mansion, the confusion begins. The family has to spend the night due to a flash flood, the master of the house does nothing but stare at them all the time, and the butler (Terrence Stamp) is constantly sneaking up on them. Then, the family decides to split up. Once they do, all cohesion in the story is lost as we jump back and forth between family members as they wander through the house. In search of what? Where are they going? Why are they even there?
We never really get any good answers, but by the time the movie is finished, we've seen good ghosts and bad ghosts, walking skeletons and a talking crystal ball. A curse is lifted which allows the ghosts to go to heaven or to the other place which brings about a resolution, or rather simply stops our heads from spinning.
Here's what Disney should have done: they should have partnered with (or purchased) Hanna-Barbera and turned this into a Scooby-Doo movie. That would really have been perfect. We could have been entertained by Scooby and Shaggy running and hiding from ghosts and could have followed along as Velma, Fred, and Dapne unraveled a mystery.
In any case, The Haunted mansion isn't all bad. It's fun enough to watch if you don't really care about the plot. It's scary enough to live up to its name. The set itself is marvelous and there are bits and pieces here and there that come straight from the theme-park ride, which are fun to see if you've been fortunate enough to survive the ride. And there are a few gems in there such as when Madam Leota (aka the crystal ball, played by Jennifer Tilly) says to a frustrated Jim Evers, "Try and fail. Try and fail. But you never truly fail until you stop trying."
A fun little ride, but not much more.
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