Dr. Seuss is rolling over in his grave. At least he died before he could see Mike Meyers ruin his classic children's book, The Cat in the Hat. On the surface, or in the previews, this might seem like a good movie to see, but let me warn you. This movie that's called The Cat in the Hat isn't all that.
This becomes painfully obvious when we first meet the cat in the hat (Mike Meyers). He says about one rhyme and then gets stuck on the word "feline." He eventually gives up and says, "I've never been good at rhyming anyway." To me this was not the Cat in the Hat saying that, but rather writers Alec Berg, David Mandel, and Jeff Schaffer admitting to the world that they have absolutely no talent and have no business even attempting to write a script based on a book from Dr. Seuss.
I mean how hard is it to write a rhyme?
People do it all the time.
Whether it's a poem or a song,
It's the rhyme that moves it along.
It gives us its charm and allure,
Which we all appreciate I'm sure.
But for Alec, Jeff, and Dave,
It seems no sane critic would ever rave.
As for Mike Meyers all he gave,
Was an Austin Powers' "Oh behave!"
And I really wish he would, you see.
For there's no need to see dog pee,
Or cuss or swear in front of kids,
For that is what this bad cat did.
I think they all should hide in shame,
For they have spat upon the name
Of Theodor Geisel, a.k.a.
Dr. Seuss, whose work was play.
The biggest thing that stands out about this film is not how poorly it was written or directed or cast, but its blatant inappropriateness. In my opinion, the movie is much too vulgar for children, especially young ones who are learning to read Dr. Seuss' books. However, the movie is not at all entertaining for adults because it is so mindless. So I must ask, "Who were the makers of this film trying to target as an audience?"
I've been thinking very hard, trying to come up with something good to say about this movie. I can only think of two things. First and foremost, I feel this movie has found a future star in young Dakota Fanning who plays Sally. I'd really like to see her in a good or even a half-way decent movie because I think she's just great. And finally, Alec Baldwin, who is usually so awkward and shady in his films (even when he's not trying to do so), fits in perfectly here as the creepy boyfriend, even though his character was totally made up for the movie.
However, two compliments aside, you couldn't PAY me to watch this movie a second time, and I strongly urge EVERYONE to STAY AWAY from The Cat in the Hat.
Once again, the book is so much better than the movie.